Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mothers Day

I am normally all for any day that wants to celebrate me, but I have to confess that this year I was ... hesitant? removed? apathetic? bah humbugish? I am not even sure what I am about Mothers Day this year - except that it is very different then last year.

Do you have days that live in your memory as golden? They were so close to perfect that they should be subtitled with, "God is in his heaven and ALL is right in the world!"

Mothers Day 2008 was one of those days for me. We had planned in advance to picnic at Washington Park in Denver with friends after church and the day was sunny and beautiful. On the way to the park we picked up Popeye's Chicken with an extra tub of red beans and rice just for me (it is a long standing addiction). From there we proceeded to laugh and play - volleyball, track ball, boccie ball - you know - all the important ball games. The boys stripped down to their swimming trunks and played in the creak with the Vernaza boys and relished every minute of it!

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At the end of the day we went home exhausted, sun burnt and happy.

*****Then came the week that changed everything*****

This Mothers Day - 2009 - was gray and cloudy with mists of rain off and on. The Carlson men asked what I wanted to do on my day and I have to admit I felt more then a bit withdrawn (maybe life remembers the wounds of last year). Most of the day was spent giving me time and space to process through... I guess memories of last year.

And now, at the end of the night, the boys are getting ready for bed and I am realizing that this day - while very different - is no less golden then last year.

God IS in his heaven, I am loved by my boys and all is right in my world.